Watching Her Chapter 43 - Flik and Princess Atta

~~~~OOO~~~~OOO~~~~
Chapter 43 – Flik and Princess Atta – A Bug's Life
These two love to argue, and love to love.

Edward, 

Remind me to never throw food at you. I can't believe you did that to Emmett. Not saying he didn't deserve it, but when you pay someone back, you pay them back! Good thing you two have Jasper to keep World War 3 from erupting. I have a feeling that he takes his job seriously; he'd have to I think with the two of you. You know I mean that in the best way, right? Your friends sound really nice. I'm nervous about meeting them, but excited, too. Nothing compared to what my stomach does when I think about seeing you for the first time, and don't even think about asking, because I'm not telling you! 

So you're leaving early for camp, huh? Is it bad if I say I wish you weren't going? I know your parents feel bad about missing your birthday though, so I understand about them wanting to do something to celebrate. You and your friends will have fun in Seattle for the week before you go to Oregon. Phil and Mom missed my 16th birthday. I was pretty bummed, but I never told them. Phil was in the playoffs that year; I bet you remember that don't you? It's so weird knowing you know who he is, but to me he's just Phil, but anyway. Mom never left me very often, in fact hardly ever, but Phil really wanted her at that game that year so they had our neighbor, Mrs. Hinojosa, stay with me (she taught me how to make the most delicious guacamole, do you like it? If you do, maybe I'll let you taste it sometime). Mom was gone for a few days and I don't think she even realized my birthday was going to be while she was away, until it was too late. When they got home, I swear it took a week before they stopped apologizing, then they took me to a Taylor Swift concert and it was a night I'll never forget. 

Thanks for reminding me that there are plenty of good memories, I just need to remember them. 

Has anyone ever told you, you're a great guy … because you are. 

And if I haven't said it in a while, or ever, I'm really glad that you couldn't sleep that one night. 

Bella

~~~~OOO~~~~OOO~~~~


Bella,

I don't think I can talk to you any more … how can you not love the Beatles? I mean, you call yourself a musician (and yes, you are a fucking amazing one) but really, you don't even like them, not even a little bit? A Hard Day's Night? Hey Jude? Yellow Submarine? Okay, I'll give you that one, but come on! 

I suppose if you make me some more cookies I'll forgive you. Those things would bring world peace, I swear they would. But wait, never mind. I want to keep them for myself. Emmett would do just about anything for some of those. Ohhh … I need to remember that. I have a secret weapon now! 

Of course I want to keep you for myself, too. 

Um, you asked me most embarrassing moment. Ugh, I can't believe I'm going to tell you this. Okay, we were playing in a big tournament in Seattle. It was the spring season, probably early April, and of course the ground was wet like it always is. Anyway, we had the ball and were moving up the field, like Jas and I were flying and the guy that was marking me had to be at least ten feet behind me. Jas was in the perfect spot, a little off center of the goalie and ready to just head the ball in when I passed it to him. I remember feeling a little off while I was running but all I could concentrate on was getting Jasper that ball. Well, I did send him the perfect ball, at the same time as my shorts fell down around my ass, and past my knees. I was going so fast that my feet got tangled up in my shorts and I fell face first in a soft spot of the field and landed in a huge mud puddle. There I was in the middle of the field, face covered in mud, and my ass on display for everyone … and the worst part? I'd forgotten to do laundry the day before so I was wearing a pair of boxers that Emmett had given me as a joke for Valentine's Day … they were black and had hot pink lips on them. 

Good thing? Jasper scored and we won the game. Even better? I gave Em some boxers for Easter that year that had little bunnies on them. 

I like it when you smile, Bella, I like it a lot. 

I like you a lot. 

Edward 

~~~~OOO~~~~OOO~~~~


Edward, 

Did you see the moon tonight? 

It was so big and so bright and the sky was so clear. I think I saw a million stars. 

I wished on one.

I wished for you to kiss me. Do you think my wish will come true?

Yours, 

Bella

~~~~OOO~~~~OOO~~~~


Bella,

I dreamt about you last night. Granted I dream about you every night, but last night was different.
We were together someplace, though I don't know for sure where it was, but wherever it was, we were happy to be there. We were happy because we were together. 

And yes, I kissed you. 

Over and over and over again.

I hope you like kissing as much as you do in my dreams because I plan on kissing you a lot. 

I'm yours if you want me to be. Please want me to be. 

Edward

~~~~OOO~~~~OOO~~~~


Creeper,

I hate you right now, like seriously hate you. 

Okay you asked, are you sure you want to know? I'm mad at you because you know since you asked I'll tell you, but if you were here, I'd really beat you over the head with my drumsticks. 

Some dates but only two serious boyfriends, if you can call going out with one boy when I was fifteen for three months serious … and really we didn't go anywhere, at least not anywhere our parents didn't take us, and it was only to like the movies and out to eat. Then I dated this one guy when I was sixteen for almost five months so it was a little more serious. We actually broke up not long before Mom's accident. He had a car, a Volvo, that he thought was so awesome but really was kind of dorky, but I didn't have the heart to tell him that. Oh, God, please don't tell me you have one of those … you don't do you? 

And um … shit … okay … kissing of course. Under the shirt, under the bra, inside the jeans but not anything more than that. And God, I so want to kill you right now, I've only been outside the jeans.

Happy now? 

Ugh, I'm going to go beat on some drums and imagine it's your face. 

Bella 

~~~~OOO~~~~OOO~~~~


Drummer Girl,

So much violence, does that mean I don't need to worry about you taking care of yourself now? Wait, don't answer that because no matter what the answer is, it won't matter anyway. You don't have to worry about it, not while I'm around at least. 

And I plan on being around for a long, long time. 

Is it possible to kick my own ass because I really kind of feel like doing that now. Or bleach for my brain. Or maybe for a round-trip ticket to Phoenix to go beat the shit out of … well fuck, I don't even know who, only that the thought of you with some nameless, faceless asshat (or more than one which is even worse) makes me want to go on a rampage. 

One of these days I'll learn to keep my damn mouth shut, especially when it comes to you, but fucking hell, Bella, I want to know everything about you, even the stuff that makes me want to pull my hair out. Like hearing you talk about someone else kissing you, touching you, when I've not even stood closer than fifty feet from you. I'm totally not counting the accidental almost meeting in the Thriftway, which right about now, I'm seriously considering kicking my ass … again … for fucking up. 

Guess it's my turn now, huh? How the hell did you do this? I feel like I'm going to be sick. This won't change anything will it? Fuck, what I wouldn't give to call you right now, but then hearing your voice would turn me on and I definitely wouldn't want to tell you any of this then, so fuck it, maybe this is for the best. 

You know, we're pretty brilliant when you think about it. We're getting all this awkward shit out of the way first and when we finally see each other face to face there will be only you and only me and nothing else will matter. 

Okay, no names from me either, unless you really want them because unlike me, you will eventually know who all these people are. Kill me now. Girlfriends – I dated one girl for a few months during this past year. Honestly I think it was so she'd have a date for Prom because we broke up the week after. Before that, a few others here and there, but usually only for a few months. Like you, some dates, too, to things like the Soccer Banquet and Homecoming but they weren't anything serious. 

Um … kissing yes. I've been under clothes, top and bottom. Haven't been any further than that though, fingers only. And, ah shit … they've been (and really not that many, I promise!) inside boxers, but again, hands only. 

Jesus Christ, I want to shoot myself. And I don't have any drums to beat on so I'm going to go run … for a really long fucking time. 

See you tonight … 

Fuck do I ever need to see you. 

Edward 

~~~~OOO~~~~OOO~~~~


Edward, 

Oh God. Thank you, thank you, thank you! I've been figuring out a way to ask you if we could text and email while you're at camp, but was so afraid you'd say no, I couldn't do it. I know, a stupid thing to worry about, but still, you never know, you know? 

I want you to do so well, and I want you to have to stay longer because that means the coaches think you're good enough to move up to the next level (like I already know you are!) I want you to have fun with your friends and eat lots of junk food and go watch the Sounders play and scream until your throat hurts … but I don't want you to forget me either. 

I'm going to miss you so much. 

You'll text and email, right? And you'll still write in our notebooks? 

I'm going to miss you. I know I said it already, but I really, really will. 

When you come the night before you leave, will you come closer? I want to give you something to take with you, but I want to give it to you … and I want to hear your voice, just one time, before you go. I know you have a lot to focus on and I don't want to mess that up. I know if we saw each other now, it would. You've worked so hard, and for so long, and I won't let anything, especially me, get in the way of that. I want to be selfish and beg you to just come inside, but I can't do that and to be honest, I'm not sure I'm strong enough to let you go once I have you in front of me. 

I can't believe it's almost time for you to go. I thought I'd have more time, you know? And I didn't think it would scare me so much to say goodbye but I'm terrified of you leaving and not coming back.
Please don't forget about me. 

Yours,

Bella
~~~~OOO~~~~OOO~~~~